First thing:
Brandi Carlile's cover of Creep. . oh man.
It's on right now, I fucking love it.
I wish I wasn't at home so I could sing along and hollar.
"I don't care if it hurts! Because I want to have control!!!"...
"I want you to notice, when I'm not around."
Yeah.
Fuck yeah.
That song rocks my socks.
Hee hee. . . just to keep you all updated on my soundtrack :)
I'll post my playlists one of these days, because I think I've got it down.
Okies. Song is over, I can focus again.
I just had a great night out with some co-workers
And it's like meeting some familiar strangers.
Because going out with these co-workers,
you're not bound by the shackles of work.
You can think and act freely without worrying that a client might overhear you.
Me and one of the ladies that came out tonight talked at length about vibrators,
and not to say I didn't think she masterbated or something,
I mean, to correct that, I just never thought of her and masterbation ever at all.
So to talk with this person, who is bubbly and sweet and fucking great
about dildos and vibrators. . .it was interesting.
Then to have another girl chime and and give us her expertise on the subject,
well, that is a whole 'nother thing!!!
I guess that is a slightly graphic way to say that I had fun discovering these people.
People that I know and rely on in the workplace,
but to see them in a different light
and to be able to appreciate them in a different, more personable way.
I don't want to compromise my leval of care for the clients I work with,
but dammit, there are so many interesting co-workers I share time with at work
that I want to talk and talk and talk,
and as bad as it is, I get annoyed to be interrupeted with client-care!!!
Because I want to have 1:1 time with my co-worker!!!
Hahaha. . so awful.
I will blame my divulges on the couple beers I had.
If anyone asks.
I don't really think this! Right? It's the 3 Blue Moons talking.
Oh lord Laura. . .
Okies, onto my original original thought. . .
Writing children's books.
Let's go this way.
Recently an awesome friend brought up something about writing children's books.
He'll write, I draw.
Great. I love it.
I was thinking more about this.
Two different thoughts within this whole children's book vein.
1. How awesome was Shel Silverstein in real life?
I mean, The Giving Tree??? Dang, it's like how I live my life!!! I always want to give. Give until there is nothing left. Reading this story as a young child really helped shape that, in a way, I think. I found that to be so beautiful. All the tree wanted was the boy's company. . and she wanted for him to sit, but when he couldn't, she accepted that. I love it. Selfless giving. I like to think I give selflessly, but I don't. Not like that. I get something out of it. I feel great and I feel happy knowing that I made someone else happy. Whoa, this is not about me, back to Shel. Have you seen the pictures he has on the backs of his books? He looks like a beastly beardy man!! I wonder what he was like in his day-to-day life. He had to be one nice son of a bitch, because anyone that can put those kind words and insights into stories like that. . I mean, you have to be nice as a person, but also creative to put those morals and values into a story that will impact people. . .I bet he was nice. I wonder if he got a chance to be a father. I bet he was a good father. A charming quality in a man is if he will make a good father. The ability to say grown-up things in a child-like way. I think kids can handle big real-world problems, you just have to break it down into chewable pieces so they don't become overwhelmed by new ideas. Children would have the best reaction to real-world grown up bullshit. . kids say what they think without the worldy politics influencing their words. I'm excited to have kids someday because I'm excited to be able to talk to them. Just to say "Hey, what do you think about that?" They are infinitly interesting.
2. I want to change the world. I thought a great way to do it would be to model good behavior through raising some decent kids. My children that have hearts of gold and magical powers will heal the world by their rightous acts of goodness. I was thinking, another way of doing this. This whole healing thing. I should expand. Me and my pack of kids won't be able to reach every child and needing person that is out there! We will be amazing, but we'll still just be human. I was thinking. . .what if I could write a children's book that had such good content, that it could influence children to be better people? Share more, love more, smile more, be more thoughtful. . I don't know. How amazing would that be!?!? To influence people when they are young and impressionable to grow up and be more helpful to strangers and to be more accepting of their world and all the people in it. I feel like a level of revolution or positive change has to happen in our youth. They are the future, if they were brought up to love everyone and accept people and to have unconditional compassion. . .what a world we would live in today! So that's what it is. . .I want to write a book/collaborate on a book that encompasses some good moral values that could help bring forth generations of good people. That's not so hard right? Haha. . yeah.
Ironically I am finishing this posting on this song:
Pedro the Lion: Blueprint of Something Never Finished.
Haha
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Monday, January 19, 2009
Please.
"Can you just come over here and kiss me like there won't be complications tomorrow?"
"You know I can't do that."
"Please."
"No."
"But I want to feel like I have no bones."
"You know that there is no such thing as 'no complications' when it comes to us."
"Can we just pretend that there isn't a tomorrow, just for tonight?"
"You need to stop calling me."
"I know."
"You know I can't do that."
"Please."
"No."
"But I want to feel like I have no bones."
"You know that there is no such thing as 'no complications' when it comes to us."
"Can we just pretend that there isn't a tomorrow, just for tonight?"
"You need to stop calling me."
"I know."
The world is as you are
I just heard a quote.
It's my favorite for the moment.
"The world is as you are."
Fuck yeah!!!
It is to say:
"Life is what you make of it."
Right?
Because I am the controller of my fate.
I see the world as I want to see it.
If I'm having a good day,
it's because I released myself from all the shackles of need.
I freed myself from the clinginess to control things.
I am accepting things as they are.
If I'm having a bad day,
It's because I am creating my own misery.
I am the only one that can change my life.
I am the one that creates my path.
Any set backs are just obstacles.
Any obstacles are just power that I relinquished to someone or thing.
To be really happy,
To be totally free,
Is to see that the world is as it is,
And that I create my happiness or misery
By the way that I interact with this world, this life.
Damn!
That line is sending vibrations into my body!
Oh, I had Horchata for my first time today.
My life is changed forever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Horchata is a cold, sweet rice-milk, flavored with cinomin)
Seriously, go to this mexican restaurant:
La Poblanita
Lake St & 17 Ave S
1617-1623 E Lake St
Minneapolis MN 55407
It's so good.
Pretty darn authentic.
Cheap food, huge portions!!
Great strawberry milkshakes too :)
I've eaten there twice and have been very pleased.
I'm not kidding, go there.
Go now!
It's my favorite for the moment.
"The world is as you are."
Fuck yeah!!!
It is to say:
"Life is what you make of it."
Right?
Because I am the controller of my fate.
I see the world as I want to see it.
If I'm having a good day,
it's because I released myself from all the shackles of need.
I freed myself from the clinginess to control things.
I am accepting things as they are.
If I'm having a bad day,
It's because I am creating my own misery.
I am the only one that can change my life.
I am the one that creates my path.
Any set backs are just obstacles.
Any obstacles are just power that I relinquished to someone or thing.
To be really happy,
To be totally free,
Is to see that the world is as it is,
And that I create my happiness or misery
By the way that I interact with this world, this life.
Damn!
That line is sending vibrations into my body!
Oh, I had Horchata for my first time today.
My life is changed forever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Horchata is a cold, sweet rice-milk, flavored with cinomin)
Seriously, go to this mexican restaurant:
La Poblanita
Lake St & 17 Ave S
1617-1623 E Lake St
Minneapolis MN 55407
It's so good.
Pretty darn authentic.
Cheap food, huge portions!!
Great strawberry milkshakes too :)
I've eaten there twice and have been very pleased.
I'm not kidding, go there.
Go now!
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Get Gone
I am feeling that travel itch again.
I need to go some place different.
A change of scenary.
I don't have money saved up,
so just a little trip will do.
Drive off somewhere,
look at stuff,
sample the community,
take some pictures,
breathe in other people's air,
and then check into some crappy motel somewheres.
I really want to go to a lighthouse.
I am finding a certain romance with lighthouses lately.
And maybe it's just 'Dan in Real Life' that started it all,
but I find a symbolism in light houses that mirrors
everything I have ever wanted in another person.
A light in the darkness.
A vigil over chaotic seas.
Something solid and stoic.
There are 5 lighthouses up along Lake Superior.
It'd be a 2.5 hour drive.
I could do that.
Weather grant me passage!
I need to go some place different.
A change of scenary.
I don't have money saved up,
so just a little trip will do.
Drive off somewhere,
look at stuff,
sample the community,
take some pictures,
breathe in other people's air,
and then check into some crappy motel somewheres.
I really want to go to a lighthouse.
I am finding a certain romance with lighthouses lately.
And maybe it's just 'Dan in Real Life' that started it all,
but I find a symbolism in light houses that mirrors
everything I have ever wanted in another person.
A light in the darkness.
A vigil over chaotic seas.
Something solid and stoic.
There are 5 lighthouses up along Lake Superior.
It'd be a 2.5 hour drive.
I could do that.
Weather grant me passage!
Monday, January 12, 2009
Maybe if.
Maybe if I gave more,
he'd see my selfless acts
And see a beauty there that he couldn't live without.
Maybe if I smiled more often,
he'd see how happy I am,
and feel that he needed my smiles around to cheer him up.
Maybe if I cracked more jokes,
he'd see what a good attitude I have
and he'd keep me close to tell him to keep going when he's down.
Maybe if I had cooked a better dinner for him
he'd see what a good homemaker I am
and he'd realize how nice it would be to have someone that'd take care of him.
Maybe if I made him more trinkets and affections
then he'd see my creativity
and love me for my ability to see art in all the angles of life.
Maybe if my butt were more shapely and my gut more slender
then he'd be able to look past the outside
and love what I have on the inside.
Maybe if I had sang along with him in the car that night
he'd hear my voice
and feel like he wanted to sing along with me forever.
Maybe if I kissed him the right way
he'd never want to stop.
Maybe if I had tried harder
Maybe it would have all worked out.
Maybe he just hasn't seen the best parts of me.
Maybe he doesn't know what he passed up.
Maybe if I would have shown him all the sides of me
that make me more beautiful inside
than she is on the outside
maybe he would still be here in my bed
rather than chasing after her instead.
he'd see my selfless acts
And see a beauty there that he couldn't live without.
Maybe if I smiled more often,
he'd see how happy I am,
and feel that he needed my smiles around to cheer him up.
Maybe if I cracked more jokes,
he'd see what a good attitude I have
and he'd keep me close to tell him to keep going when he's down.
Maybe if I had cooked a better dinner for him
he'd see what a good homemaker I am
and he'd realize how nice it would be to have someone that'd take care of him.
Maybe if I made him more trinkets and affections
then he'd see my creativity
and love me for my ability to see art in all the angles of life.
Maybe if my butt were more shapely and my gut more slender
then he'd be able to look past the outside
and love what I have on the inside.
Maybe if I had sang along with him in the car that night
he'd hear my voice
and feel like he wanted to sing along with me forever.
Maybe if I kissed him the right way
he'd never want to stop.
Maybe if I had tried harder
Maybe it would have all worked out.
Maybe he just hasn't seen the best parts of me.
Maybe he doesn't know what he passed up.
Maybe if I would have shown him all the sides of me
that make me more beautiful inside
than she is on the outside
maybe he would still be here in my bed
rather than chasing after her instead.
CLOUD CULT!!!! I LOVE YOU!!!!
I realized how much I fucking love Cloud Cult.
I put their album down for about 3 weeks, and this morning I revisted it.
--->Which as a side note, is my favorite thing to do.
I take a cd that is near played-out for
me, by means of myself -really, and I bury
it and put it out of my mind for awhile, then I go back to it and listen to it again.
It's like falling in love again.
It's like the saying "distance makes the heart grow fonder".
Yeah, that happens, for sure. Or when I bust out something from the vault,
(It's surprising how much of "Very Unnecesary" by Salt 'n Peppa that I
remember the words to. ) and I get to time warp myself back to the time that
I listened to that album/artist. Ok, tanget over, moving on.
I was listening to 'Meaning of 8' on my way home. Damn!!! What a remarkable cd!!!!
Everytime I listen to it, I still love it. Dare I say that it is my most favorite cd of all time??
Shit dogg, it's getting close. There are songs that I get a little choked up on when I sing along with them. And I like that. I like that a song written by a stranger can move me personally. It applies to me in my own way and by my own relation. Knowing some of the background with this particular band makes it clear to what events the lyrics are translating, but still, the music seems to embrace all situations as such and gives you a means to overcome the dire straights that you're going through. This band has suffered something so great and yet Craig, lead singer dude, is able to sing "I guess I'm lucky." What the fuck? I mean, he lost his 3 year old son. It was totally unexpected and unavoidable. To me, losing your child would be the worst pain ever. I can't imagine. But here is this husband and wife on stage, bleeding their hearts out for us all to enjoy. They invite us into their world by means of beautiful music. Beautiful, uplifting music!! "It's a song, Life is like a song, It's a song, a hummable song" Fuck yeah it is!! This band moves me. This band makes me feel that no matter what, as long as you LOVE - you will overcome. As long as you take it in stride, keep your head on level, and LOVE everyone you encounter. . you'll be okies. Oh, and recycle. They seem to like that too.
So, it is with everyone that is important to me, that I must pay hommage to this band. I need to show the love I have for them to them. But I don't want to come off as some creepy groupie weirdo girl. I have enough trouble seeming like a creepy weirdo girl :) haha BUT I really want to give them something. The whole band! Something to say. . .thank you. Something to show my gratitude. Sometimes I don't feel like my words are enough to show someone how thankful I am that they are in my life. Sometimes I have to make things to show them how appreciated they are. I want to do that for Cloud Cult. For showing me that it's darkest before the sunrises.
Damn. Great fucking band.
"Take Your Medicine" is one of my favorite songs. It's great. It was this song that really broke me down a few weeks ago when I had a hard night at work. I was driving home and it came to the latter part of the song, where the lyrics go:
"These are things that I keep hidden in my belly, I can't see them but they control my life. For a moment you can see right through me, see right through me, Help me make this right."
Damn. I bawled. The whole drive home. Pounding it out with a closed fist to my chest. ."Help me make this right." with my hot tears streaming down my cold cheeks. I'm sure all the people that I drive by on 94W at 9am think I'm nuts. Everyday it's something different that I'm rocking out to in my car. Everyday it's some sort of antics for the morning commuters to be amused with.
*sigh*
But yes. I love you Cloud Cult.
Thank you.
I put their album down for about 3 weeks, and this morning I revisted it.
--->Which as a side note, is my favorite thing to do.
I take a cd that is near played-out for
me, by means of myself -really, and I bury
it and put it out of my mind for awhile, then I go back to it and listen to it again.
It's like falling in love again.
It's like the saying "distance makes the heart grow fonder".
Yeah, that happens, for sure. Or when I bust out something from the vault,
(It's surprising how much of "Very Unnecesary" by Salt 'n Peppa that I
remember the words to. ) and I get to time warp myself back to the time that
I listened to that album/artist. Ok, tanget over, moving on.
I was listening to 'Meaning of 8' on my way home. Damn!!! What a remarkable cd!!!!
Everytime I listen to it, I still love it. Dare I say that it is my most favorite cd of all time??
Shit dogg, it's getting close. There are songs that I get a little choked up on when I sing along with them. And I like that. I like that a song written by a stranger can move me personally. It applies to me in my own way and by my own relation. Knowing some of the background with this particular band makes it clear to what events the lyrics are translating, but still, the music seems to embrace all situations as such and gives you a means to overcome the dire straights that you're going through. This band has suffered something so great and yet Craig, lead singer dude, is able to sing "I guess I'm lucky." What the fuck? I mean, he lost his 3 year old son. It was totally unexpected and unavoidable. To me, losing your child would be the worst pain ever. I can't imagine. But here is this husband and wife on stage, bleeding their hearts out for us all to enjoy. They invite us into their world by means of beautiful music. Beautiful, uplifting music!! "It's a song, Life is like a song, It's a song, a hummable song" Fuck yeah it is!! This band moves me. This band makes me feel that no matter what, as long as you LOVE - you will overcome. As long as you take it in stride, keep your head on level, and LOVE everyone you encounter. . you'll be okies. Oh, and recycle. They seem to like that too.
So, it is with everyone that is important to me, that I must pay hommage to this band. I need to show the love I have for them to them. But I don't want to come off as some creepy groupie weirdo girl. I have enough trouble seeming like a creepy weirdo girl :) haha BUT I really want to give them something. The whole band! Something to say. . .thank you. Something to show my gratitude. Sometimes I don't feel like my words are enough to show someone how thankful I am that they are in my life. Sometimes I have to make things to show them how appreciated they are. I want to do that for Cloud Cult. For showing me that it's darkest before the sunrises.
Damn. Great fucking band.
"Take Your Medicine" is one of my favorite songs. It's great. It was this song that really broke me down a few weeks ago when I had a hard night at work. I was driving home and it came to the latter part of the song, where the lyrics go:
"These are things that I keep hidden in my belly, I can't see them but they control my life. For a moment you can see right through me, see right through me, Help me make this right."
Damn. I bawled. The whole drive home. Pounding it out with a closed fist to my chest. ."Help me make this right." with my hot tears streaming down my cold cheeks. I'm sure all the people that I drive by on 94W at 9am think I'm nuts. Everyday it's something different that I'm rocking out to in my car. Everyday it's some sort of antics for the morning commuters to be amused with.
*sigh*
But yes. I love you Cloud Cult.
Thank you.
Friday, January 9, 2009
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
It works
This is a test. This is only a test.
I can blog from my phone.
Fuck'n A man.
Oh, and that isn't a test, obviously, it's a fire.
More wacky phone photos are sure to come.
Now get out of here.
Monday, January 5, 2009
Super Connected
*yay* one of my favorite Broken Social Scene songs.
I'm craving a beautiful experience.
I have the feeling of needing to be known.
Perhaps that is why I started to write blogs again,
aside from wanting a profile so I could make
comments on *other* people's blogs. hee hee :)
But, I want to deeply know another person.
I want to have a close close friend to confide in.
To share with.
I want someone to know my ambitions
And the goofy trains of thought that run through my head.
I want a co-creator, co-conspiritor.
A co-pilot on adventures and travels.
Someone that knows who I was, who I am, and who I'm trying to be.
Someone that I am fiercly loyal to and that I can trust and rely on.
Someone who accepts me on days that I am a bitchface.
And someone who doesn't take advantage of me when I'm being nice.
I have amazing friends.
I have friends that are there for me.
I have friends that I tell secrets to.
Actually, I'm really excited because
I finally have a girl friend that I hang out with once in awhile.
A girl that I can text/call when I'm having a bad day.
We bitch to each other about men.
Make snarky comments about things.
And knit together :)
I have not had a close female friend since my friend Anne moved away.
My friend Anne is the most beautiful amazing passionate person
that I have ever gotten the chance to get close to.
I admire her strength to live and pursue her dreams.
She and I felt so deeply for each other.
I told her everything.
I miss how intense our friendship was.
I miss hugging her and holding onto her for dear life.
I miss knowing that no matter where or when,
she would come for me, she would be there for me.
I want her to come back, the distance has hurt the connection.
I miss having someone to cry to.
Someone to sing with
(I love singing, but I'm terrified to do it in front of anyone)
I miss having someone to celebrate with.
As I date around to try and find a good guy,
I realize that I'm really just looking for a best friend.
I mean, if I get to have nakie time with this friend, bonus,
but really,
I'm just trying to find an unwavering intense friendship.
Someone to talk to for hours and hours and hours
until we're both just sitting there in silence
completely in awe of the revelations
and ideas that are being exchanged.
I love having talks with people that almost require
that moment of silence to digest everything.
I get to have these moments from time to time.
I have a pretty great group of friends as it is.
I guess I shouldn't be greedy by hoping for more.
Maybe I used up my one great friend that life granted me.
Maybe all we get is that one person that keeps us from coming apart.
Maybe I was so lucky with Anne
that now my friends will be just normal, adult friends
that talk about normal adult grown up stuff.
Friends that keep it light and just want to talk about how my day was.
Or what diet they are trying.
Or what they are planning on doing this weekend.
Which is fine.
I will take every interaction and appreciate it greatly.
A friend is a friend is a friend.
I feel like I'm getting whiney.
And ungreatful sounding.
Bah!
Where did my teen years go?
With the friends that I had that felt it all.
With the dreams that I had that were unmarred by reality?
I am still very much the person I was back then.
But it seems like everyone else grew up.
I don't want to grow up.
Ever.
I still want the friendships I had when I was 17.
Oh!
Another great Broken Social Scene song.
"you used to be one of the rotten ones and I like you for that. .
now you're all gone, got your make up on, and you're not coming back. . ."
*sigh*
breathe.
keep creating.
everything that should happen, will.
as long as i am open to every experience
as long as i embrace every heartbeat and breath
as long as i appreciate all the people that have walked through my life
i will be better at who i am
i will live more fully
i will see more clearly
be open.
I'm craving a beautiful experience.
I have the feeling of needing to be known.
Perhaps that is why I started to write blogs again,
aside from wanting a profile so I could make
comments on *other* people's blogs. hee hee :)
But, I want to deeply know another person.
I want to have a close close friend to confide in.
To share with.
I want someone to know my ambitions
And the goofy trains of thought that run through my head.
I want a co-creator, co-conspiritor.
A co-pilot on adventures and travels.
Someone that knows who I was, who I am, and who I'm trying to be.
Someone that I am fiercly loyal to and that I can trust and rely on.
Someone who accepts me on days that I am a bitchface.
And someone who doesn't take advantage of me when I'm being nice.
I have amazing friends.
I have friends that are there for me.
I have friends that I tell secrets to.
Actually, I'm really excited because
I finally have a girl friend that I hang out with once in awhile.
A girl that I can text/call when I'm having a bad day.
We bitch to each other about men.
Make snarky comments about things.
And knit together :)
I have not had a close female friend since my friend Anne moved away.
My friend Anne is the most beautiful amazing passionate person
that I have ever gotten the chance to get close to.
I admire her strength to live and pursue her dreams.
She and I felt so deeply for each other.
I told her everything.
I miss how intense our friendship was.
I miss hugging her and holding onto her for dear life.
I miss knowing that no matter where or when,
she would come for me, she would be there for me.
I want her to come back, the distance has hurt the connection.
I miss having someone to cry to.
Someone to sing with
(I love singing, but I'm terrified to do it in front of anyone)
I miss having someone to celebrate with.
As I date around to try and find a good guy,
I realize that I'm really just looking for a best friend.
I mean, if I get to have nakie time with this friend, bonus,
but really,
I'm just trying to find an unwavering intense friendship.
Someone to talk to for hours and hours and hours
until we're both just sitting there in silence
completely in awe of the revelations
and ideas that are being exchanged.
I love having talks with people that almost require
that moment of silence to digest everything.
I get to have these moments from time to time.
I have a pretty great group of friends as it is.
I guess I shouldn't be greedy by hoping for more.
Maybe I used up my one great friend that life granted me.
Maybe all we get is that one person that keeps us from coming apart.
Maybe I was so lucky with Anne
that now my friends will be just normal, adult friends
that talk about normal adult grown up stuff.
Friends that keep it light and just want to talk about how my day was.
Or what diet they are trying.
Or what they are planning on doing this weekend.
Which is fine.
I will take every interaction and appreciate it greatly.
A friend is a friend is a friend.
I feel like I'm getting whiney.
And ungreatful sounding.
Bah!
Where did my teen years go?
With the friends that I had that felt it all.
With the dreams that I had that were unmarred by reality?
I am still very much the person I was back then.
But it seems like everyone else grew up.
I don't want to grow up.
Ever.
I still want the friendships I had when I was 17.
Oh!
Another great Broken Social Scene song.
"you used to be one of the rotten ones and I like you for that. .
now you're all gone, got your make up on, and you're not coming back. . ."
*sigh*
breathe.
keep creating.
everything that should happen, will.
as long as i am open to every experience
as long as i embrace every heartbeat and breath
as long as i appreciate all the people that have walked through my life
i will be better at who i am
i will live more fully
i will see more clearly
be open.
Friday, January 2, 2009
As You Wish.
I'm happy.
I had a really great date last night.
I went out with a boy that, I think, likes me.
I mean, I'm pretty sure he likes me.
It was a great date.
And he wasn't afraid to show me he liked me.
It was just so refreshing to be with a guy that was open about what he was feeling.
It's been a long time since I've had that.
Like, romantically.
Someone that told me "I like you".
And grabbed for my hands.
And looked at me when I wasn't looking.
And asked me "Who are you? How are you real?"
I'm smiling, thinking about it.
I got very caught up in every moment of it last night.
Someone was curious about me.
Someone looked at me the way that I look at people that I've had crushes on.
(It was like role reversal of the normal situations I'm in, haha)
He would smile at me, and then look away while smiling, and then look back.
I mean, it was a cute, shy kind of thing.
But also in that way, you know, that you're looking away
because you feel silly for how big your smile is.
And how goofy and googly-eyed you must look.
I like this person.
And they like me.
And that is just. . .amazing.
I had a really great date last night.
I went out with a boy that, I think, likes me.
I mean, I'm pretty sure he likes me.
It was a great date.
And he wasn't afraid to show me he liked me.
It was just so refreshing to be with a guy that was open about what he was feeling.
It's been a long time since I've had that.
Like, romantically.
Someone that told me "I like you".
And grabbed for my hands.
And looked at me when I wasn't looking.
And asked me "Who are you? How are you real?"
I'm smiling, thinking about it.
I got very caught up in every moment of it last night.
Someone was curious about me.
Someone looked at me the way that I look at people that I've had crushes on.
(It was like role reversal of the normal situations I'm in, haha)
He would smile at me, and then look away while smiling, and then look back.
I mean, it was a cute, shy kind of thing.
But also in that way, you know, that you're looking away
because you feel silly for how big your smile is.
And how goofy and googly-eyed you must look.
I like this person.
And they like me.
And that is just. . .amazing.
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